Mentoring 101: Advice from Bigs
January 25, 2021, Lori Dossett
Like any relationship, a match between a Big and a Little takes time, energy and dedication to grow strong. Making an effort to develop a strong relationship with your Little will definitely pay off in the long term. Research shows that longer, stronger mentoring relationships have a greater positive impact on children. According to our Bigs and Littles, a meaningful relationship is also incredibly rewarding and fun!
We asked Bigs to share their advice on nurturing a meaningful relationship with their Little. Here’s what they had to say:
Keep it simple
Kay says: “The best advice is just hang out. It’s not about what you do. It is about being together. Sometimes just experiencing what your life is like is something Littles enjoy. Some of the best conversations can occur while driving in the car.”
Stick with it
Pat says: “Early on you might not think you’re making a difference or that the relationship is getting stronger, but it is. Sometimes we all just keep our guard up a bit, and sometimes individuals, maybe especially children toward new adults, don’t show their emotion or gratitude right away. Stick with it. You’re making a huge difference. The moment when you find out will come, and it’s awesome.”
Be consistent
Barbara says: “Let go of the fantasy of some immediate great bond. Relax and keep showing up even when it’s difficult, and your Little will learn that they can count on you.”
Be flexible
Alex says: “Always come up with multiple ideas of things to do. If you only have one, they may have recently done that activity or just don’t want to.”
Stay connected
Kelsey says: “Take time to connect weekly, even if you don’t have plans. Sometimes the conversation can feel one-sided, but by showing your Little that you are committed and thinking of them regularly helps foster a close relationship.”
